Apathetically Speaking...

Sorry for I am not the best lad, For I cannot say what is inside my heart, For my mouth is sewn, interlaced with fears, Scared that my heart which is filled with desire, And lust and passion, Would burst out, And nakedly show what I feel for you, And make both this lad and you, the girl in the silk dress, To succumb into the pit of guilts, Embraced with remorse. How I wish, The least I could do, Was to move these lips and whisper to you, That this lad who could make the devil kiss his leather boots, Is catastrophically in love with you. But, I am being myself- a coward. Inspiration: The Infernal Devices by Cassandra Clare

People are funny. Especially those who are close to us. We think we know them, but the shocking truth is, we still have a long way to go to know the real them. Silly us~ Nevertheless, the process of knowing oneself is tough. Do you really know who you truly are? My lecturer, Dr, Mazli imposed this question upon us last Tuesday. I could tell that most of my classmates looked lost; it was as if they were trying so hard to look for the answer. I think, to make it easier, we could just simply say 'Yes' or 'No' as our respective answer. But that would be so definite, so... limited. Life is limitless, don't you think? And so does the process of getting to know the real you. Then, you can try to get to know others better. SillP/S: I don't know who am I either. 

We can't just predict the future. From what I've been going through since (I am not going to say since I was born because I just can't fucking remember any moments at the time I was brought out to this world) I could remember, it is not-that-really impossible but still there is unlikely what I'm thinking what would come up in the next second may come true. It might come true but, you know, it might. And things might not as well turn up the way we want to. Maybe we want certain things to happen but let's face it- who are we to decide what will happen next; who are we to decide our fate. Let leave it to God, shall we? I just finished watching Silver Linings Playbook it was an awesome movie. Yup, I did shriek every time Mr. Cooper smiled and I kinda screamed when he danced with Miss Jennifer Lawrence. They were such a cute pair in that movie. I want to say I'd totally raise up my hands if you were to ask me if they would make a nice couple in real life, but that...

Hey you. Yeah. You there. I miss you.

Don't. Stop. You are not in my shoes It is not for you to choose (Although you are partially deserved). Still, You have failed to observe What is wrong with yours truly Yes- Me. I am always stuck in between Are you that keen To watch me independently crushed from inside (Oh well, what can I do) I can just oblige! I am sorry But this is my attempt I am trying to adapt And make you accept Me.

Life is very depressing at the moment. My life, sorry . I'm starting to embrace my bad habit which is procrastination. And I can feel its claw digging my body from deep within and it hurts.